There's No Business Like Show Business
by TheFunnyGirlDefyingGravity
Summary: Hi! TheFunnyGirlDefyingGravity and LeaGirlWriter22 here! So, this story is about theatre... Musical theatre! The glory of it all, the setbacks that occur, and (this will be the largest portion of the story) the funny and awkward moments that all theatre kids face at one point or another. From horrific wigs, to ripped costumes, to dead mics, to the most embarrassing scenes and more!
1. Chapter 1

Opening night is one of my favorite nights. The energy, the nerves, the excitement. Standing backstage, bouncing on your toes, listening to the overture. Your mic is finally in place after the terrible struggle getting it on under your costume. Your makeup has been perfected; it's much to heavy for most occasions, but tonight, it's exactly what you need. You've warmed up your vocal chords, run through those few pesky lines that always seem to slip your mind, and had a proper meltdown the night before. Finally, you're ready.

You listen to The Narrator...There! It's your cue! You count silently to the beat of the drum: _1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7-now! _You practically bounce out from behind the curtain, the knot of nerves in the pit of your stomach melting instantly. Your smile is bright, rivaling the sun with its intensity, for this moment-right now- is the one you've waited for since your name appeared on the top of the cast list three stressful months ago.

Words cannot describe how hard you've worked to get to this moment; how much energy you put into this, how many tears you shed, how many sacrifices you've made along the way. That date with your long-term crush you had to turn down due to tech week, that test earlier today you probably failed due to your nerves, that huge party you had to miss because of auditions, every single one of your weekday afternoons for rehearsals... Despite your previous notions, everything seems worth it now.

You open your mouth. "Little town,it's a quiet village/ Ev'ry day like the one before/ Little town, full of little people/ Waking up to say-" The stage suddenly fills with the rest of the cast, and the audience overflows with smiles.

The show has begun!

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hi! TheFunnyGirlDefyingGravity here! So, this story is about theatre... Musical theatre (insert scary music)! The glory of it all, the setbacks that occur, and (this will be the largest portion of the story) the funny and awkward moments that all theatre kids face at one point or another. From horrific wigs, to ripped costumes, to dead mics, to the most embarrassing scenes- this story will have all the best and worst moments in our theatre lives. **

**When I say 'our', I refer to myself (Nessa/ TheFunnyGirlDefyingGravity), the amazing LeaGirlWriter22 (who is my co-author), and you! Yes, you! PM me your story, and if it's "deemed worthy" by Lea and I, then we'll publish it so that all of the world can hear about your "fun" on the stage!  
**

**Obviously, this chapter is very short, but you need not worry, for it was simply the introduction to...There's No Business Like Show Business by LeaGirlWriter22 and (me) TheFunnyGirlDefyingGravity!**

**And no, you do NOT have to be a theatre kid to enjoy this story! As a matter of fact, you could hate musical theatre and still love this story! It's for everyone!**

**As you can probably tell by now, this isn't actually a Les Mis story, however, Les Mis seemed like the best place to put this for two reasons: 1) Lea played Cosette in a production of the show, and I'm currently playing Fantine in a production; 2) No offense to anyone, but let's face it... No one reads the stuff in the Misc. category. So despite it not technically being Les Mis, we hope you'll still read it! :)**

**Our first story shall be posted soon, but we'd love to hear from you about this (coughcough*slightlyboring*coughcough) chapter! (That means: everyone reading this should review!)**

**-Nessa**


	2. I really blew it I think I've got it!

**AN: Hey guys! Thanks for the positive feedback! It meant a lot to Lea and I! We were expecting reviews stating that everyone hated it, so we were pleasantly surprised when we saw your reviews! Special thanks to Iceflower (Guest) for being the very first reviewer, and to River-Pond-Melody-Song for being the very first person to follow and favorite this story (and me as an author)! **

**To Original Name, is there any way that you could get an account? I don't have a problem with it being submitted through reviews, but everyone would see the story before it was published, so I don't know if I could publish it. Accounts are free,**

**and really easy to manage, even if you don't publish any stories, in fact, I got mine recently, and I absolutely love it!**

**To everyone, feel free send in a story! We're starting with auditions and ending with cast after-parties, so send in your moments! Lea and I love hearing your stories and getting reviews! Come on... Don't you think I haven't seen the "traffic stats"? I know people are reading this, so please review!**

**-Nessa**

**PS: I'm apologizing right now for my horrific writing in this story, I swear the next chapter will be better! I slept for less than an hour last night, and I'm spending the week in NYC, so this was written in about five minutes. Basically, it's terrible. I really wanted to get this up today, though. so here it is-full of errors and boring as crap. Don't hate me!**

**Lea's is amazing, though, so hopefully, mine will just be drowned out by hers! ;)**

**Disclaimer: we own none of the mentioned musicals, only the stories that come from them!**

**Story One-Negative-Lea**

I stand on my tip-toes trying to get a clearer image, but my eyesight just isn't cooperating. I huffed in impatience as I sat back down, noticing the line becoming thinner as each person took their turn. I feel the knot in my stomach growing. I blow away a strand of hair from my face and try giving myself a pep talk.

It wasn't like this was first time I've ever auditioned for a main role. I mean, I know I'm good enough, my vocal coach knows I'm good enough, even my younger annoying brother- who thinks I'm the ugliest human being alive- thinks I'm good enough. So what the heck is wrong with me? Why am I feeling that today isn't my day?

I sigh again as I watch another girl auditioning for the role I wanted. It's supposed to be a hard role but it seems like every girl wants it... A sharp giggle cuts me out of my thoughts and I jump from my seat, alarmed. I know that giggle, I had hoped that she wouldn't come and audition, that maybe luck, would be on my side and she would have the flu, a stomach bug, a fever...anything that would have prevented her from coming to the auditions. However, a small glimpse of her damn yellow sundress, and my suspicions were confirmed. No one dresses that freaking color except her; no one even has that annoying giggle except her.

Meredith freaking Samson…

Ugh, I hate that girl with a passion! It's like she's out to annoy the crap out of me. Each time I audition for a role, she has to audition for it too. It all started because I got the role of Alice when our class did Alice in wonderland. (Might I add that we were in the second grade?) She's been a nightmare ever since.

I know she doesn't even want this role, she even said in the hallway once that she hated the movie. But would something like that stop her from auditioning after finding out that I wanted that part? No. Not Meredith Samson.

I take a quick glimpse again and she was still out there, trying to be all flirty and perfect. Like hell she is. Even her name sounds annoying; I mean who names their kid Meredith? Like Hanna from pretty little liars, you can just imagine big pores and mousy roots.

I take another look, but this time I was watching our drama teacher and the school's vocal coach. They were responsible for the auditioning process. Our drama teacher looks convinced, but I guess she only cares about how Meredith looks the part. I take a look at my brown hair and I roll my eyes. Just because Sandy (from Grease) has blonde hair and Meredith has blonde hair, it doesn't mean that they're twin sisters! Meredith is a devil spawn, and I can't believe they're fooled by her ever-so-sincere smile!

"I'm going to be singing, Don't Stop Believing by Journey"

As soon as those words were out of her mouth, I wanted to go to her and slap her. Is she serious? That's my song! I always audition with it! She always auditions with I Feel Pretty-it's like her stupid signature song! Don't Stop Believing is MY good luck song, and she freakin' knows that! She's seen me audition with several times and has always commented on how stupid it is... she doesn't even like that group!

"Ok thank you very much!"

I missed her singing and I sighed in disappointment. If I don't get that part because of her, I'm really going to do some damage to her "perfect" blonde hair.

The rest of the line went quickly, and I found myself coming up next. I watch as Prudence Calvin went up and rocked that stage, but was relieved when she said she was auditioning for the role of Rizzo, not Sandy. I know Prudence has a great vocal talent…her father hired a really great vocal coach for her; I guess she wanted to have something to compensate for being named Prudence.

"Thank you so much!"

I hear the football coach say. He's also directing the musical with the drama teacher and the vocal coach, but why he's doing it is beyond me.

"You're up next"

I nod my head and I take a deep breath before entering the stage. I quickly pass my sheet music to the accompanist and take another deep breath as I reach the center of the stage.

"And your name is?"

I resist the urge to roll my eyes- I've been in this school for two years now, so I'm pretty sure our drama teacher knows my name. I've also auditioned for several of the school musicals.

"I'm Lea; I'll be auditioning for the role of Sandy."

"Leanne Thomas right?" I cringe as he says my full name. I hate my name, that's why I just call myself Lea; I know it's a rip off from Lea Michele but it's not like Lea Michele is my next door neighbor.

"Yes."

"And what will you be singing?"

"Don't stop Believing by Journey?"

It came out as a question rather than an answer. Mrs. Greenly, our drama teacher just smiled a fake smile at me and motioned me to start.

I take another deep breath, reminding myself that this isn't my first audition and I turn back and gave a nod to the one on the piano.

The music begins playing and I try to compose myself. When it came the part that I'm about to sing, I closed my eyes to try and calm myself down, but I already missed the beginning. Panicking, I opened my eyes, throwing the directors an apologetic glance...well at least I hoped it was one.

The music started again and I desperately tried to get along with the rhythm:

"Just a small town girl

Livin' in a lonely world

She took the midnight train goin' anywhere

Just a city boy

Born and raised in South Detroit

He took the midnight train goin' anywhere

A singer in a smokey room

The smell of wine and cheap perfume

For a smile they can share the night

It goes on and on and on and on

Strangers waiting

Up and down the-"

I stop suddenly- the music still playing in the background. I curse myself and I close my eyes. I can't believe it: I just choked one of the song I knew best.

I feel horrible looking up and meeting the directors' eyes.

"Will that be all? Thank you so much!"

She sure didn't sound like it. I smile nervously again.

"I was wondering if I could have another go? It's just really nerve-racking and I've been up all night tryin-"

"I'm sorry but you only have one chance and we still have plenty of people who want to audition. We'll be in touch." She smiled another fake smile and motioned me for the exit.

I drag myself to the exit and shoot a glare at Miss Greenly's back. No doubt, she was already fooled by Meredith acts; I guess she already planned the whole thing in her mind, because they really can't afford to have a brunette play the main character (who's a blonde). Have they ever heard of this delightful invention called wigs? I mean Miss Greenly could actually use one.

This is practically the worst day of my life, and it's all because of Meredith freaking Samson…

Life is sometimes so unfair.

**Story Two-Positive- Nessa**

**This story takes place a few years ago when I was in the sixth grade, and my older sister Eliza (Liz for short) was in the eighth grade. Note that our school musical involves the kids from all four middle schools in our town, so yearly about 400 **

**kids audition for 100 spots in the cast (yes our casts are enormous).**

**•••••**

"Alright, you guys are free to go. Thespians hang back- if you don't know what a thespian is, then this doesn't involve you." My chorus teacher, who also happens to be one of the directors of the school musical, said, clearing the room of everyone but the theatre kids.

"Okay, my theatre muffins, are you ready for this years musical?" She teased us, already knowing our answer, and using her "endearing" nickname. After pretending to listen to our over-enthusiastic reactions, she continued, "the 2010/2011 school musical is... You're a Good Man Charlie Brown!"

Naturally, everyone was excited (to say the least); already claiming parts and rushing to learn the audition song- My New Philosophy. Of course, claiming parts was useless, for everyone had to audition, as was rushing to learn My New Philosophy, since we had two weeks to practice.

On the walk home that afternoon, my sister, Liz, and I discussed the show, the audition song, and the parts available. Liz considered herself light years ahead of me in the theatre world, despite the fact that I had been doing theatre for years, whereas she had only participated in school productions. Not to mention that her biggest role consisted of exactly two lines. Obviously, (by her logic) she was much better than me! None the less, she decided that she would like to be Sally. I told her that I wanted Sally too, but she just laughed, saying "Ness, leads only go to eighth graders, if anyone's going to get this part, it's me!" I was determined to prove her wrong.

•••

The date approached quickly, and before anyone knew it, audition day had arrived. After an interminable school day, I approached the auditorium with three of my friends who were auditioning as well. We warmed up our vocal chords as we walked down the hall, most likely heavily annoying the teachers in each classroom we passed. Our nerves were through the roof, knowing that the odds of making the show at all were not in our favor. Annually, about ten sixth graders made the show; it was tight competition.

The auditions went in alphabetical order, an interesting way of doing things, but a way, none the less. Eventually the 'S's' were called.

"Eliza S-?"

As much as I wanted the part, I still hoped Liz did well, and well she did. Her audition was flawless (for her standards anyways), and she finished with a smile- proud of herself. As she exited the stage, Ms. H called the next name, "Vanessa S-?"

I stood up, head held high, surprising myself with sudden confidence. Just as I mounted the stage, Ms. H exclaimed, "Wait! Are you Eliza's sister?!" Seeing my nod she continued, "Wow, I can't believe I didn't put that together before! Oh, well, don't worry, I'm not going to hold it against you!" At this comment, Liz's jaw had dropped open in complete and utter shock. I just smiled, and waited for her to start the music.

"Just like a busy bee/each new philosophy/ can fly from tree to tree and keep me moving/ When life's a busy maze/ on alternating days/ I choose a different phrase/ My new philosophy!" I finished with a breath of relief, feeling that I had done my best.

Then, putting me in shock, Ms. H exclaimed "Oh my God! Vanessa, where'd that come from?! Are you sure you're related to Eliza?! There's no way! Wow... Okay... Moving on..." then under her breath she muttered, "Dang... There's no way..."

Needless to say, my audition went pretty well, although it also caused a week of silent treatment from Liz... Not that I'm complaining.

•••

Finally, after a week and a half of pure torture, the cast list was posted. By the time I got to the music room, an enormous crowd had already formed. Suddenly, I was aware of exclaims of "What?! A sixth grader?!" and "Who the heck is Vanessa S-?" Upon hearing my name, my breath caught in my throat, and my eyes widened to double their normal size.

Sure enough, when I eventually pushed my way up to the front if the crowd, there was my name, fifth down from the top. Vanessa S-... Sally Brown. I was absolutely shocked, and I nearly cried.

By the end of the day, the school was in shock. Never before had a sixth grade girl gotten one of the leads, boys had, but never a girl. However, the other leads, Kristin (Lucy) in particular were happy to welcome me into the show though, congratulating me and telling the others to lay off. When I turned on my phone that afternoon, there were 5 new text messages, one from each lead. They all had the same point: stating that Kristin had given them my number, that they were not at all surprised that I had gotten the role, and not to let haters get to me. To this day, Kristin remains one of my good friends.

•••

Auditions can have the funniest effects on a school, and if you're the one who shocked everyone, the way you handle the situation can determine your survival. I proved to the haters that I could pull off their role, and never once did I sink to their level. What would you have done?

**Hope you liked them! Review please! Hmm...wonder who can guess where the title's from...**

**-Lea and Nessa**


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